Monkey See, Monkey Doo Doo

A few days ago was Madeline's friend Max's birthday. We were all invited to Monkey Joe's to celebrate with him!

It was Madeline's first time and I had a sneaking suspicion she was going to LOVE it!I was right! After we made our way through the world's longest line to get in, she was super antsy-pantsy to start jumping! I had a bit of a conundrum with a newborn in tow, but I was bound determined to do my best to let her experience everything. With LOTS of help from my dear sweet mama friends Madeline got to run, jump, and slip all over the place! My friend Emily wore Jackson in the sling so I could tackle some of the big slides with Madeline. Being her first time she was a little shy learning the lay of the land. But, in no time she (and I!) was going down these enormous slides and slamming into the inflatable walls. I knew getting her out of there was going to be heartbreaking, so I decided to let her stay an extra long time since we don't get down there all that often.

A lot of our friends left around noon,but a few stayed to play a little longer. After a yummy break of cupcakes and pine-cone throwing, we ventured back into inflata-land. My friend Julie offered to take Madeline with her and her two daughters to play while I nursed Jackson. Everything after that was in slow motion. I took Jackson out of his carseat and noticed he was quite smelly. I was expecting it as he hadn't had a dirty diaper in 3 days. I wasn't expecting it to be quite so huge. All the way through his diaper and up his back, through his onesie, and through his cute overalls. Sigh. I started peeling away the layers of ick with Madeline commentating on every step. "Now he pooped. Now you wipe it up. Now you wipe it up again." (Thanks Madeline) During this poop excursion she proclaimed she needed to go potty and started to dance. Julie came to my aid and offered to stay with Jackson so I could take Madeline potty. Her daughter also needed to go so I said I'd take them both. We get about 5 steps away and a little crazy child ka-BAM smacked into Layla and she bit it. I helped her up and took her back to her mom for some TLC.

Meanwhile Madeline's dance is getting more frantic. I rush back to her and take her to the bathroom and do THAT whole song and dance. (no pun intended) We treck back to our spot where dear Julie has finished cleaning up Jackson. She takes her girls to the bathroom as I finish up Jackson. As I was about to tighten his diaper I noticed that he had huge beads of sweat running down his face and hands.

I had a heart attack.

Jackson as born with a slight heart defect . We had a bunch of tests run after he was born and everything indicated that he was just fine and would continue to be for the rest of his life. The cardiologist told me to watch for ONE thing - excessive sweating. That would indicate his heart was working too hard and I needed to get him to an ER as soon as possible. So in the next 3 seconds I was trying to go through all the scenarios that needed to happen. Where was the nearest hospital? Did my cell phone get reception in here? Do I take him myself or do I call an ambulance? Will they allow Madeline to go in the ambulance too or do I need to call my parents? Is my child going to be all right?

Then my little narrator kept saying "He spill water on him! He spill water on him!" Then I noticed another little body part was wet.

SIGH.

And the mother of the year award goes to..........ME! Apparently I didn't get the diaper closed quickly enough and whilest lifting him to clean the poo explosion, he gave himself a shower. Oddly enough my husband had told me that he had read about this happening and I laughed at him. Out loud.

Oooooops.

I cleaned him all up and tried to let my blood pressure come down. I was overjoyed with relief that my son was in no real danger, but mortified at the amount of bodily fluids he had submerged himself in during the last 5 minutes.Julie reappears and helps calm me down - assuring me that I'm not the worst mother in the world, and wisks Madeline off with her girls to go bounce while I get myself together and try to feed Jackson.Madeline had an awesome time at Monkey Joes and I know we'll be back. But next time, I'll be prepared.

Changing a baby girl is not all glitz and glory;

But changing a boy is another horror story

You hold his feet with one hand

and the diaper with another

The whole time praying,"Please don't pee on your mother!" (or yourself, in this particular case...)